A Fanboy and Chum Chum Thanksgiving
by Jessica12357
Summary: Jessica invites her friends for a Thanksgiving dinner, but doesn't expect the one sorcerer she hates to show up, and Kyle finally finds an advantage he has over his enemy.


A/N: Jessica, being my OC, is the only thing I own. Also, Jessica's parents will be like everyone else's parents (with Oz's exception) and be non-existent in this story. Sorry this story took so long to come out, but I had writer's block like you wouldn't believe. XD

...

Making Thanksgiving dinner for my friends Fanboy and Chum Chum, my boyfriend Kyle, and me seemed like an easy task. Kyle was starting to get used to them being around us, though he prefers us to be alone, of course. I had just put the turkey in the oven and obtained the materials for the pumpkin pie when the phone rang. Of course my hands were full, so I walked over and hit the speaker button with my elbow.

"Hello?"

"Hello, Jessica darling." It was my sweet Kyle. His accent was even cuter over the phone, and made me feel not so stressed out from making the dinner.

"Hi Kyle," I said. "How are you?"

"I'm doing well," he replied slowly. Something in his voice sounded troubled.

"Kyle, are you alright?"

He hesitated before sighing, "Jessica, there's something I need to tell you. There will be someone accompanying me to your Giving of Thanks feast." Since Kyle is British and doesn't technically celebrate Thanksgiving, he's been having a hard time remembering the name.

"Really?" I was surprised. "This is awfully sudden. Who is it?" There was a really long pause, and for a moment I wondered if Kyle was even there. "Kyle, I'm still here, you know."

Finally I heard him say, "Sigmund is coming with me." I dropped the bowl I was mixing dough in through shock.

"SIGMUND! Why is he coming?" I cried. I was just now recovering from the mention of that arrogant sorcerer's name.

"I'm sorry, lovey, I really am," he said, "but you know how Sigmund is having shows all week?" I recalled seeing posters at the Frosty Mart and Oz's shop about it.

"Yeah, what about it?"

Kyle sighed again, this time with exasperation. "Well, he needed a place to stay in town while he does them, so he decided to board at my house for _some_ reason..."

"So why is he coming over to _my _house for dinner?"

"Oh, it's my fault. I never should've told him where I'd be going. Now he insists to come along."

"He doesn't even celebrate Thanksgiving!" I protested. "He's German for Pete's sake!"

"I know, but you know how thickheaded he is. Besides, you know how Germans love a big meal, and Sigmund is no different. You wouldn't tell that by looking at his waist. Sweetheart, will you forgive me for my slipup?" I didn't want Kyle to think I was mad at him, because I wasn't. I just disliked Sigmund SO much for several reasons: he's a jerk, he's arrogant, he makes Kyle feel like a loser, he tries to take me away from Kyle, he sneaked into our dance and made himself look like Kyle just so he could kiss me, etc. The list goes on and on.

"Oh Kyle, it's not your fault," I said. "You tried, but I'm just going to have to make a spot for him at the table."

"Are you sure it's not too much trouble?" Kyle added hopefully.

"No, as long as you come, I'll be happy. See you at 6:00. Love you!"

"I love you, too!" Kyle sounded a lot happier now that he saw I wasn't angry at him, and we hung up.

...

At 5:45, everything was finished except for the turkey, which was only had a few more minutes to cook. I ran up stairs to change clothes, though I wasn't getting freshened up for Sigmund, of course. I came down in a red sweater and jeans, but nothing fancy. Kyle didn't really care what I wore.

At 5:50, Fanboy and Chum Chum arrived, their usual hyperactive selves.

"Hi Jessica!" they greeted. I noticed they were wearing jackets over their superhero costumes. No wonder, considering the cold.

"Hey guys, come on in!" They didn't hesitate to escape the brisk November chills. I poured some cocoa for us to hold off until dinner, and we sat on the couch. I explained to them that we would be having an additional guest.

"Really? Who is it?" Fanboy asked, wiping off a cocoa mustache.

"Sigmund, unfortunately," I answered.

"SIGMUND!" they cried excitedly. "Oh boy!"

"Why are you two so excited?"

"Jessica, Sigmund is the coolest magician and sorcerer in, like, the WORLD!" Chum Chum said dramatically. I doubted that somehow.

"We watch his show every week, you know," Fanboy added.

"But haven't you guys already met him?"

"Yeah, but it's been a long time!" said Chum Chum. "And we saw him perform LIVE last night at the park! Why didn't you go see him?"

I stirred my cocoa and said quietly, "Because I don't like him."

"Why not?" Fanboy asked.

"Remember what happened at the dance weeks ago?" I asked. They thought for a moment.

"Ohhhh..." they said simultaneously. They remembered all right. Then the doorbell rang again. I stood up to answer it, but Fanboy and Chum Chum already darted past me. "We'll get it!" They opened the door, and I felt elated to see my darling Kyle. He wore a sweater striped similarly to his shirt and a red scarf.

"Hello, my love," he smiled. I smiled back, and we hugged. But then I noticed who was right behind him: Sigmund the Stupidhead. My smile disappeared at his presence.

"Kyle, there's some cocoa in the kitchen if you're cold," I offered, ignoring Sigmund.

"Oh, thank you so much. It's simply frigid out there!" Kyle walked away, and I turned to Sigmund, who was wearing the same thing I'd seen him in the last time we ran into each other: tight pants, black leather jacket, fingerless gloves, and a Victorian dress shirt.

"Hallo, _frauelin,_" he smiled. "So nice to meet you again."

"Wish I could say the same about you," I retorted, crossing my arms. He ignored my comment and made a boquet of flowers materialize in his hand. Obviously he was still in love with despite what had happened at the dance.

"For you, dearest." He handed them to me, and at first I just stared at them.

"Ummm...thanks, I guess," I stammered. That seemed to satisfy him enough, and he joined the others in the living room while I put the flowers in a vase. Suddenly I had an idea on what to do with Sigmund. The drugstore was only a block from my house, so I secretly walked out the door to it and bought a box of laxatives. hen I came back, I put it in the cup I was going to give Sigmund and stirred it perfectly. No one would tell until later. I smiled to myself as I walked out to the living room with Sigmund's cup. He seemed rather surprise at my jovial attitude towards him, and so was Kyle.

"Thank you, _fraulein,_" he responded when I gave it to him. Kyle gave me a suspicious look, but I just me it with a smile. I didn't know if Kyle thought I was hitting on him or what, but secretly conjured up a piece of laxative himself.

"Sigmund, what is that dreaded thing on the wall!" Kyle exclaimed. Sigmund jerked his head in the direction Kyle was looking.

"Where?" While he was looking at the ceiling, Kyle plopped the lax into the cocoa and stirred it with his hand. "I don't see anything."

"Oops. Must've been a shadow," Kyle replied innocently. "But go ahead and sip your cocoa." Sigmund shrugged and did so, not suspecting a thing. Kyle did his best not to laugh, and I decided it would be a good time to start eating.

...

The turkey was set out on the table, and Kyle helped me cut out slices of turkey for us.

"Wow! That looks yummy!" Fanboy grinned.

"I can't wait to eat that!" added Chum Chum.

The turkey was finally passed around, and a blessing was said. I happened to glance at Sigmund after the prayer was said, and he had his mouth open wide, revealing his prominent beaver teeth. Then he looked at it like he was expecting something.

"Sigmund, what are you doing?" I asked.

"My dinner isn't serving itself," he complained. I felt like just smacking him in the head for being so stupid.

"I am not a sorceress, remember? You're going to have to take your fork and knife and eat it yourself. I am NOT feeding you."

Kyle snickered. Sigmund glared at him, then proceeded to cut his turkey. It was rather amusing to see him struggling against it and being compared to Fanboy and Chum Chum who were eating theirs happily without trouble. Kyle and I smiled at each other, and I think Sigmund got jealous for a split second.

"Ooh! Sigmund! Did you see us last night at your show?" asked Fanboy.

"Huh? Oh, _ja, ja. _I saw you." Sigmund seemed distracted, if not uninterested in Fanboy's inquiries. He ate a bit of his potatoes and listened as Fanboy and Chum Chum rattled on about how amazing he had been.

"You know, sometimes it's what the person _does _that's amazing, not the person themselves," I cracked. Kyle snickered again, and Sigmund tried not to notice. Suddenly he let out a shriek of fright.

"Something just rubbed against my leg!" Sigmund jumped into his chair and looked down, expecting some kind of horrific creature. However, it was only my beagle Lucy, looking up at him with sweet brown eyes and a gently wagging tail, which is probably what hit his leg.

"You got scared by a dog!" Chum Chum giggled. Sigmund's pale face blushed in shame as he sat back down.

"What does the canine want?" he demanded.

"Knowing Lucy, she just wants you to drop some food. But don't do it because she's fat enough already," I replied. Fanboy and Chum Chum apparently thought that was the funniest thing ever, because they literally fell off their chairs laughing. "Guys, it's not that funny."

"_We_ think it is!" Fanboy returned when he came back up. Lucy kept staring at Sigmund for a while, and I thought it was because he still had some turkey left. But I was terribly wrong. She growled at Sigmund, and it made him scoot over a little in his chair.

"Hmm...fluffy _and _a good judge of character," Kyle remarked. Sigmund stuck out his tongue, but that only made Kyle want to push it. "Seriously, Sigmund. You're going to have to stop acting like a child..." Sigmund kept his mouth shut for the rest of the dinner until the pie was brought out.

"Mmm...smells delightful!" Sigmund commented. "Kyle once tried to make one, but the clumsy fool 'sploded the room." He chuckled to himself at Kyle's expense. Kyle grimaced and flushed with anger.

"Watch it, Sigmund," I warned. "You're going to get your comeuppance one day for making fun of Kyle."

"It would've came a lot time ago, _mein liebe_," Sigmund replied, cutting a piece, "considering his utter failures in the past. That's why I call him 'the constipator.' He pushes and pushes, but what does he get in the end? Nothing!" Kyle looked at his hands sadly, and I was beginning to get aggravated. I prayed that the laxative would kick in soon. All of a sudden, it seemed that God heard me in an instant. Sigmund's face changed. He looked pained and his hand flew to his stomach, which loudly rumbled."Uh oh...I'll be right back!" He ran off quickly in the direction of the bathroom. The four of us couldn't help but look at each other and laugh joyfully.

"Oh Kyle, you're amazing," I said.

"You're the one who put the laxative in his drink," Kyle insisted.

"You did, too," I winked.

"You saw that?"

"Yes, and I did it because I couldn't stand the way he treats you."

He sighed. "But in a way it's true. He has more money than I do, more success, more everything!" I felt so sorry for Kyle. None of my reassurance could repair his esteem. Then something popped in my mind. It was so obvious I didn't know why it hadn't come sooner.

"Wait a minute! There _is _something you have Sigmund doesn't!" I cried.

"What's that?"

"What does Sigmund want so badly he made himself look like you and came to our dance?" Kyle thought hard at my question, then realized the answer.

"You're right!" He got up from his chair, walked over to me, and put his arms around my neck. "I've got you..."

"Well, I'm not much of a prize," I said modestly, "but you have an advantage."

"Are you joking?" Kyle chuckled. "You're the most valuable prize I could ever wish for. Let's continue this in the living room, shall we?" I knew what was coming, so I looked over at Fanboy and Chum Chum, who were spraying whipped cream at each other.

"Guys, could you excuse us for a minute?"

"Sure!" Fanboy murmured through a mouth full of cream. "Go ahead!" Kyle and I joined hands and walked into the living room, smiling slyly.

...

Though we didn't see him, about ten minutes later Sigmund came back to the dining room."Ugh," he groaned. "I thought I would not make it..." He noted my and Kyle's absence. "Where is Kyle and Jessica?" Fanboy and Chum Chum were licking up the rest of the cream.

"They went into the living room," Chum Chum answered. Sigmund strolled casually into the living room. What he saw next sent his mouth dropping, along with his confidence. Kyle and I were sitting on the couch, fully embracing each other, our lips in complete contact, which is how we had been for the whole ten minutes. We heard him utter a quick cry of girlish fear before looking over at him. His eyes were wide and he looked like he had seen a ghost. One of them twitched a little, but Kyle only crossed one leg over the other in victory and smirked.

"Well, if it isn't Sigmund the Constipated!" he declared in mock recognition. More twitching.

Sigmund finally sputtered, "Did I miss something here?" Kyle laughed patronizingly.

"What's wrong, Sigmund?" he inquired, standing up. "Are you unable to face the truth? The fact I have a gain over you? The fact I, Kyle the Conjurer, have something, or in this case someone, you desire yet not possess?" Sigmund's arms dropped to his side defeatedly. His lip trembled weakly. Sigmund knew that no matter how much he gloated, Kyle would always have the one thing he wanted: me (I am not trying to brag, it's just how this situation seems).

Seeing that there was nothing more left for him to finish, Sigmund said quietly, "I think I will go now. Thank you for the dinner. _Auf wiedersehen._" He disappeared in remorse in his cloud of pink, purple, and blue sparkles just as Fanboy and Chum Chum came in.

"Hey, where's Sigmund going?" asked Fanboy.

"Oh, who knows?" I said carelessly.

"There's still some pie left," Chum Chum offered. "Want some?"

"Why not?" Kyle answered cheerfully. "Shall we, my dear?"

I smiled and took him by the hand. "We shall." The remaining of us four finished the pie, conversing jovially as if Kyle didn't get agitated by the two costume boys, as if they had been friends ever since he came to America. But one thing is for sure: my first Thanksgiving in my new home was the best one I ever had.


End file.
